"Is it better to be hypocritically nice or brutally honest?"
If you say hypocritically nice, does this mean you only whisper 'brutally honest' (as nice a euphemism I can think of) things behind someone's back?
And if you say brutally honest, could you really say these things to a person's face? Which begs the question,
Is it better to voice your criticisms to someone's face or voice your criticisms to someone else, where the information will hopefully filter back slowly to the object of affliction, if at all?
As far as I can remember, King Duncan probably never knew what (or who) hit him. ('Twas a stab in the dark, you see.) As for Caesar, we all remember his response... Ah, so, if you're going to stab someone, would you do it in the dead of the night without anyone knowing, or in front of everyone in broad daylight?
Please realise this is merely an analogy - if you stabbed someone in broad daylight you'd be clapped in irons faster than your victim can scream "Arghhh!!". Then again, if enough passers-by (it's the plural of passer-by. Trust me.) are around, it's possible that nothing might happen at all. All of them would not only be so affronted that you perpetrate like that in front of everyone! but also would do nothing, believing someone else would do it.
Anyway, I digress. Sort of. The question still remains, however - which would be preferable, even suitable behaviour that should govern a principled person every time? Or does it, like most economics students will tell you, "depend on the situation"? And on the other hand...
Certainly, it's quite enjoyable to engage in a little gossip and bitching behind someone's back - though certainly not as enjoyable for the gossipee in question. Well, even if the gossipee were included in this gossip, likely results would run along the lines of the same person still being uncomfortable. Here we are presented with an interesting conundrum - your gossipee is unhappy whether you tell him/her to the face or behind the back. So folks, what should someone do?
There's always the third option of shutting up. But oh dear, not sharing information is selfish and unhealthy for the person who's learnt some exciting new things and is bursting to tell. And of course, being able to dish out the bad stuff on someone makes you feel, in a tiny way, superior.
Coming back to our analogy, Brutus needed to dispose of a possible tyrant. *stab* Problem averted. Macbeth wanted to be king. *stab* Wish granted. Now, if we were to really relate this analogy as closely as possible to my question, we would come up with this: That in order to prevent people from becoming tyrants, we stab, I mean... criticize them to their face. And in order to take power from others, or well, just diminish them, we stab them in the back. And in order to become an immortal daughter of the air, we stab no one at all and throw ourselves into the sea (10 points if you can get the reference.)
No matter what choice you make, someone gets hurt. Sort of. I'll just end off with something my boyfriend has taken to saying : Ignorance is bliss.
That's also a subject of contention, but never mind.
:: nimezs @ 11:27 am [+] ::
