Dear [Insert Friendster name], Thanks for your note. [Insert ingrating smiley] It's so nice of you to say that about my [Insert noun]. [Insert yet another smiley]. No, I wouldn't mind being friends if you could prove to me you're worth being friends with.
On the whole, I would rather NOT be friends with you because you seem to lack the spunky originality that I so do enjoy. While your letter was not stupid enough to warrant a trip to the trash, it is rather humdrum. Were you to try this on me in real life, I might actually be nice about it and carry on a conversation. At least until you've sucked dry my already minute reserves of small talk.
While I AM a sucker for good pick up lines, your choice of words in your introductory message hardly leaves me gasping for more of your smooth talk.
No, I do not want to exchange phone numbers with you. Your age and job are of no importance to me. No, you may not find out where I live.
And plying me with words like "honour" "reply" "waiting" "hoping", doesn't really make me any more eager to get back in touch with you.
Well, now you know. I don't expect to hear from you again, and on the whole, if you didn't, you'd just be confirming my first assessment of you. Of course, you might write back, and I could be forced to alter my prior impression. You could be a bigger idiot than I thought.
Lots of Love,
[My Friendster Name]
:: nimezs @ 1:16 am [+] ::
