It seems to me that there's not much point in putting blogs up because they serve the dual purpose of ranting and updating my sordid life, and my visitors only come for one reason or the other. Therefore, after some uncognitive late-night blog-reading inspiration, I dedicate the following passage to my blog visitors.
on ENTER
if ($mind == important&event) /begin blog
elseif ($mind == important&thought) /begin rant
else goto :end
[Boring byline, introduction to thought of the day] Blah, blah, blah, bleh, bleh, meh meh meh. [Recap, recap, pause after utter boredom of recap]. [Wanders off to read something more interesting] [Returns after 5 minutes] Blah, blah. Blah, blah BLAH blah. Blah! Blah, blah, *grumble*, blah, sigh. [Filler, filler, filler material]. [Sudden change in train of thought] [Conversational filler] Blah, blah, blah, wah wah wah, blah.
[Angry blah, followed by increased speed in typing] Blah, blah, BLAH, [blah morphs into a rant]. Rant, rant, rant! Whine, complain, rant, [directed anger at some other whiner], [hypocritical declaration], [hypothesis], [disturbing lack of evidence for hypothesis], [sweeping statement], Rant, rant, rant, whine. Growl, rant, blah, rant, [obligatory reach for empathy from reader] whine, whine, blah blah blah, rant.
[re-reads stuff so far] [decision to argue for opposite view, thereby demonstrating complete non-commitedness to any view] [Right. Hypocritical statements] [Winds down argument] [Insertion of "It doesn't matter in the end" mantra, not to be confused with "Why do I even bother?" mantra] Blah. blah.... blah. blahblah... blah.
[strange unrelated statement]
[insertion of song/poem to echo current state of mind] [memo to self to hate all other bloggers]
